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Top 10 – Righteous Heroes

GeekOut Top 10s

The Righteous Hero is someone who has a rather strong sense of justice; to the point where you question how they can be so… Well… Righteous! They’re often overbearing, self-promoters who talk a big game. Worse still, typically these do-gooders know how to back themselves up.

But hey, you’re here to see who our favourite Righteous Heroes are – So buckle up, this is our latest Top 10!

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Top 10 – Dangerous Elderly Characters

GeekOut Top 10s

Rule #1: Do not act incautiously when confronted by bald, wrinkly, smiling men.

This rule applies to all elderly people who smile knowingly in the face of danger. It’s always worth listening to walking sticks to check for hidden swords, or observe hairpins for potential weaponization. Are those slippers for shambling slowly to the bathroom, or for whupping young whipper snappers into shape? Do they still have their own teeth? Either way it’s bad news.

Join us as we take register of the residents of this old folks dojo and secret underground retirement facility. This is our Top 10 Dangerous Elderly Characters.
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Top 10 Unfitting Characters

GeekOut Top 10s

When you’re making a cast of pirates, do you ever think of putting a bouncy ball in amongst the crew? Not really. When you’re making a story about war, do you ever think of putting scantily clad ladies all over it? Probably not. What about those times you’re designing a fantasy RPG and you design one of the main characters to be… A robot? Ah well, at least we remember these characters, right?

These characters stand out amongst the crowd; they’re odd-balled, they’re different and that’s why we remember them the most. They are against the grain of the rest of their cast – And today we’re listing down our Top 10 most Unfitting Characters. STOP! Before we continue with this, just be aware: If a whole series is weird, chances are the character actually fits in.


Top 10

10) Tails Doll – Sonic Racing R

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The Tails Doll, a character who is so insignificant, so useless and so basically average that you’d hardly believe that they’d put it in the game at all. Let alone the fact that it’s a character that didn’t exist within the Sonic universe before going into Sonic Racing R, you’ve got what’s basically just a filler character who barely fits in with the lore and mythos of the Sonic world. Yes: There’s definitely a lore behind it, don’t question it.

However, one thing that constantly bewilders me is the fact that this little weird possessed doll became one of the biggest talking points of the game. From the Evil Tails Doll Curse, to the Acid Remix of Can You Feel The Sunshine, it’s really out of place for the rest of this rather happy go lucky Mario Kart clone. Still: You can’t really blame them for adding a character like this into the game… He even ended up going into the comics as an evil doll.

9) Manta – Shaman King

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Manta is really small, which isn’t too much of a surprise with a name like that. He’s tiny, he’s got a strange haircut, we know him as Morty in the English dubs of Shaman King and he’s a smart guy. In fact, he’s probably one of, if not the smartest guy in the entire anime. But there’s always been a small feeling of aloofness about him – Like, he’s not all there. Almost as if he’s strung along by Yoh just because he has nothing better to do.

I don’t know why Manta decides to journey through the incredibly dangerous Shaman King tournament, but he seems to stay around because he’s friends with Yoh. Morty isn’t a shaman, but he can see spirits. He isn’t strong, but he’s smart. He isn’t even all that brave, except for rare circumstances, but you know what? The series wouldn’t have been the same without his worrying.

8) Twoflower – Discworld

The Colour of MagicSean Astin as Twoflower©RHI/Bill Kaye

The Disc is filled with people and narratives that point a big fat finger to real-world things and says “This is you, this is what you look like, you burk.” and no one but no one does that quite so overtly as Twoflower, the little man from the Counterweight Continent who goes on holiday and starts a revolution. He doesn’t quite fit in around Ankh-Morpork, as a generally quite dingy and unpleasant city a man with a cheerful disposition and a penchant for offensively colourful shirts stands out a mile, and yet he doesn’t quite fit in at home either.

He is, in every regard, the oddball, and that makes Rincewind a perfect companion because though he looks the part and generally fits in a whole lot better in society, he’s not exactly full-blown wizard material himself. However out of the entire cast of characters from the glorious Discworld series, say if they were laid out à la one of those Simpsons character ensembles, Twoflower would light up like a beacon.

7) Monkey – Time Splitters

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This little monkey packs a serious punch. I mean, it’s literally just a monkey and the game is very happy to tell you this over and over again. From the first Time Splitters, where the Monkey’s entry simply says “It’s a monkey” to Time Splitters 2, where the entry is updated to “Yep, it’s still a monkey”. He’s not a durable character, he’s not even all that great – but he can still wield a gun like it’s nobodies business.

The oddness of the Monkey knows no bounds. From it’s little ooks and aaks, to the fact that it’s simply a joke character, the fact that this Monkey became the mascot of the game is both hilarious and odd. They could have chosen the rather witty characters from this shooter, but they chose the goddamn Monkey!! Also, don’t get me started on just how many times I was killed by this little Monkey in the multiplayer modes.

6) Tex – Red vs Blue

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Amidst the warring teams of idiots duking it out in a box canyon of absolutely no strategic value it seems like a single well-trained individual would be able to massacre both sides* and get out unscathed, but it just wouldn’t be funny like the rest of the series. Red vs Blue began life fourteen years ago in the early days of the internet creativity boom, a crude animation made in the Halo multiplayer. Now it’s immense, and creators at Rooster Teeth are now a major animation studio, thanks in no small part to Tex.

Tex is a badass mercenary gone renegade from an elite military unit who brings a layer of seriousness to the comedy stylings of Red team and Blue team, acting as a “straight-guy” to their “funny-guy”. She’s better trained, in fact she’s the best, and she’s mostly there to save the Blood Gulch boys from all of the terrible forces that want them dead! And she also spends much of that time listening to their arguments and non-sequiturs wondering why she’s going to all the trouble.

*This link has rude words AND AN AWESOME FIGHT SCENE but it gets a little too rude for this site.

5) Tingle – The Legend of Zelda

tingle_artwork_majoras_maskIf you know anything about The Legend of Zelda, it’s that some characters seemingly don’t know when to quit. Even Link, the hero of Hyrule, is barely able to stop for a second. Tingle, meanwhile, depending on the game you see him in, is either a collector, a fan or other. Tingle is annoying and we all get annoyed when we see his stupid face around. Couple that face with the stupid green spandex he wears, damn it Tingle, why are you even in this game?!

But he does serve a purpose, so it’s not all lost. However, just because he serves a purpose, it doesn’t really mean he should be there. In all honesty, he wasn’t too bad in Minish Cap, when really he mostly served as a way to deal with all of the Kinstones. He’s been around since Majora’s Mask, so you can bet your butt that he’s not going anywhere soon. Actually, probably not a bad idea, considering he usually has useful stuff on him. Let the fairy fantasizer be, I guess.

4) Kon – Bleach

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I feel like somewhere in Shonen Jump’s contract there is a requirement for a fluffy and adorable character, or just some bracket with “Grim and Gritty” at one end and “Childish and Adorable” at the other, and all Shonen Jump properties must fall somewhere inside that bracket. So in a world of lost and murderous souls put down by a semi-divine enforcement agency with a solemn duty to save the living from the dead… put in a teddy bear. Make him wear a dress sometimes.

Kon… why? He serves the very occasional purpose for a story, or maybe he just gets a narrative of his own from time to time, and it’s usually better than the filler arcs. He’s a constructed artificial soul placed into a vessel that he brings to life, and while he’s mostly there to occupy Ichigo’s body while he’s on Shinigami duty and saving the world, off-duty he lives inside a fluffy teddy… maybe a lion? On the bright side, he’s just as irritated about the whole thing as we are.

3) Chiaotzu – Dragon Ball

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This one has always confused me, because Chiaotzu is a tiny little human. A tiny human who has always seemingly been able to fly. A tiny human who has always been at the side of Tien and a tiny human who doesn’t look at all like the rest of the humans from Dragon Ball. Now, don’t get me wrong: Dragon Ball is full of ridiculous characters, as we all know and love it for… But Chiaotzu? He seriously seems more out of place than the rest. I’ve never been able to put my finger on it before, but now I think I know why he’s so misplaced.

According to the Dragon Ball Wiki, he’s supposed to be like a Chinese Vampire. From the way he floats around the place, to the way he attacks with his arms stretched out, he seemingly is a perfect fit to this description. Even the white skin and red cheeks are a reference. Dragon Ball is full of myths and fantasy stories: Heck, it was originally even a loose adaptation on The Journey to the West… But Vampires..?

2) Squirrel Girl – Marvel

wolverine-vs-squirrel-girl

Ok, so Marvel have got just about everything in their arsenal so far as superheroes go. Every viable superpower from the incredible to the insignificant, the terrible to the ridiculous. If a reasonable backstory cannot be conjured then the mutations of the X-Men can always fill in the blanks. That Squirrel Girl exists is not a shock, at most it’s a mild surprise, and the only reasonable response is “Seriously?”, to be repeated, louder, when you find out she’s one of the most powerful heroes in the Marvel Universe!

Doreen Green is a human with squirrel attributes born of some odd genetic quirk, a long fluffy tail, robust buck-teeth, claws, agility, and yes, the power to talk with squirrels. With this incredible arsenal of abilities she has killed Thanos, bested Deadpool, and turned aside Galactus himself. She’s good enough to beat Wolverine in a straight fist-fight (no claws allowed), she’s got her own Iron-Suit, and amongst the foremost members of the Great Lakes Avengers.

But she’s a SQUIRREL! And she made friends with the World Eater! Deadpool just doesn’t hold up to that, so if you were expecting him on this list then clearly my friend, you don’t know Squirrel Girl.

1) Giygas – Earthbound

Giygas is literally the embodiment of evil. That’s what it represents; that’s what it is. It’s pure hatred in an ethereal form. It’s also a villain that we’ve grown to both fear and respect at the same time. From that menacing music, to the frightful appearance of Giygas, this is a terrifying concept for most people, as he says some of the creepiest dialogue in the game. Words like “I… Feel… H..A..P..P..Y.” Creepy.

However, Giygas is probably one of the most unfitting characters of any video game made to date. Earthbound is renowned for being really surreal and silly. I mean, one of the enemies is the New Age Retro Hippy, who likes to get rulers out and measure… Stuff. We don’t know what, but that’s one of his attacks. Couple this with the colourful characters, the zany plot and the lovable story behind it, Giygas comes completely out of the blue. Even though you spend the whole game preparing for it.


Honourable Mentions

Okay, we’ve seen some downright weird characters today. But don’t you worry, we’re not finished yet. Here are two more examples of characters that really do not fit within their properties… But yet, they kind of do in a story-related fashion. You’ll see what we mean…

Mr Poopybutthole – Rick and Morty

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Here’s an example that makes itself. The little yellow blob in the top hat joins the cast of Rick and Morty during an episode that generates all manner of kooky and poorly conceived characters like Bacon Samurai, Reverse Giraffe and Pencylvester. All of them are introduced through a series of flashbacks that make it seem like they’ve been in the series the whole time, but they’re all parasites that shapeshift into wild characters to prey on those whose trust they acquire.

The way to spot a parasite is to check your memory to see if you have any bad memories of the beloved part of your family. If they’ve never shot you, kicked you in the face or abandoned you to some terrible fate then they’re a parasite, and need to be killed. They clear out the house of all of these crazy and wacky characters they once thought were friends and settle back down to a meal of the crummiest people in the family… and Mr Poopybutthole. Oh but it turns out that he’s real, which we find out when Beth shoots him and hurts a real friend, a friend who has never hurt her.

I guess sometimes it pays to fit in, just a little more. Mr Poopybutthole is there to stand out, to be “wrong” compared to the others, because he’s the punchline to an episode that makes a huge joke out of badly introduced characters who just don’t work.

Khajiit and Argonians – The Elder Scrolls

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Not a character, but there’s something a little jarring about the bestial races of the Elder Scrolls games when you first begin. Having the sapient cats and lizards pop up in the choices for playable races mixed in amongst the variations of Man and Mer starts out as unusual until you get used to seeing them around, and their particular cultural quirks, and in Morrowind being unable to wear boots or helmets was a nuisance, albeit one that made sense.

They never seem more out of place than in Skyrim however. Cold blooded Argonians in the freezing north? Desert dwelling Khajiit treading the snow instead of the warm sands they adore? There are opportunities for them both in the proud nation, more so than for the displaced Dunmer who are hated and shunned by the more nationalist Nords, but I cannot imagine that any one of them would rather be anywhere but home.


Okay, now will you kindly stop sending me pictures of Jelly Jiggler? I understand he’s pretty weird, but we’ve been through this: Some series are just too weird to have any one unfitting character. But alas, we’re done with weirding everyone out with these rather odd characters who happen to just be there. It’s time for you all to help us for our next Top 10 – I wonder how fitting these selections will be?

That’s it for this week, we can finally stop thinking about the evil that is Giygas. Hopefully, we’ll be saved by the unbeatable Squirrel Girl and who knows… Perhaps Chiaotzu will finally have a new use. But what did you make of this really rather unfitting list? Did we do good, or did we do bad? Did we order the list the way you would have? As always, let us know what you think in the comments below, or over on Facebook, Twitter or Reddit.


Top 10 Gods

For the love of all that is holy, we’re back for another Saturday Top 10. So for God’s sake, pull up a chair and have a gander through these ancient scrolls that we’ve uncovered, telling us all of the power of these beings. They might not always be physical, but they’re certainly righteous in their own way. So whether or not you’re a believer, this list has been made to try and convert you to our beliefs.

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An open letter to Quentin Tarantino

Dear Mr Tarantino,

Should I begin by asking if I should call you Quentin? It seems a bit informal considering that we have never met. For now, I will stick with Mr Tarantino as a mark of respect. Anyway, I’m sorry that it has taken me so long to get in touch with you but life has been really busy and I’m sure you know all about being busy. It has only just come to my attention that you would fit in well with our group and I thought it would be nice for me to extend a hearty invitation to come and mingle with us at one of our meet-ups. Even though I have been a massive fan of your work for some time I have only recently seen an interview that you did back in 1992 in London promoting Reservoir Dogs. It’s probably a bit much for me to expect you to remember this interview so for your convenience I have included it below.

It’s the way in which you speak about film and film making in this interview that was a particular revelation to me. You are obviously very knowledgeable and passionate about the subject. The way you explain that during college you were not interested in sports which although is cliché Geek it’s certainly something I can relate to. I personally have struggled to embrace my inner Geek in the past. Over the past few years, I have undergone a massive change that has now lead to my life being overall improved. In our group, we try to encourage people to embrace what makes them a Geek and you certainly are a great example of that. Your early work was received by film critics with mostly a fan-fare and I love the work ethic you had for not stopping there and continuing to do what you love. Your passion and dedication for films have led you to make what a lot of people believe are some very iconic pieces. I am sure that in the wake of that you have inspired other people who may be as geeky if not geekier than yourself about films and they will hopefully go on to produce great work in time.

I probably will never get the chance to thank you or the actors involved personally for producing such entertainment. I guess I just wanted you to know that should you ever fancy an evening in a pub, in Bristol (UK) with a bunch of other people who are passionate about a number of different things then we would be more than happy to have you. This might be a bit much but we could even make our theme for the month a Tarantino theme. We could have a quiz related to your films and our regulars could cosplay from the vast array of characters you have created in your filmmaking career and you.. well you can just come as you are. I’m pretty sure that our community would be right behind this idea and would welcome you with open arms.

So thank you for taking the time to read this and be an inspiration for people around the world who may be outcast for having something they are so passionate about. If you want to get in touch with us you can send us a comment via this website or contact us via Twitter, Reddit or Facebook. I look forward to meeting you in person.


J-Drama Review: Ultraman Orb

To us Westerners, we think of this genre as “The same one that Power Rangers is in”. Known as Tokusatsu, this style of highly specialised special effects makes for a striking viewing experience. Regardless of what you think of Power Rangers, join Timlah as we take a look at Ultraman Orb.

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April TV Hype

I can talk forever about the approaching war, and the theories of DC’s potential demise. And Spider-Man, and Apocalypse, and a thousand other things coming to the cinema over the next little while but there are other, equally exciting things afoot on the small screen.

Daredevil Season 2

Or maybe The Defenders Season 3 if you prefer. The staggering successes of the first season led to an almost immediate renewal, but it’s being shoehorned into a pre-planned structure to include the recent series Jessica Jones. It’s not certain yet as to whether or not Jones has been renewed but with Luke Cage on the way later this year that should account for that, and the presence of Electra and the Hand suggest tie-ins to our final team-member Iron Fist. (more…)


Review – Farscape

It’s a little late to the game to be reviewing a series that’s fast approaching twenty years old, but I only watched it (for the second time) quite recently during a fit of serious nostalgia, but despite the years of superior special effects and quality drama Farscape bears the test of time. It’s a real testament to the staying power of practical effects and good writing that the Jim Henson company’s sci-fi series (led by creator Rockne S’ O’Bannon and EP Brian Henson) is still of excellent quality today. (more…)


The Changing Trends

We’re normal…

I’ll start that again.

By and large we’re more normal than we’d care to admit, just as prone to the same habits as those we’d refer to as “normal people”, just as susceptible to hype and we still tend to spawn a cycle of trends. It may not be clothing or music trends as such, but there is one field in which we dominate the culture… or maybe the field impacts us more deeply than others?

Couldn’t say, cause and effect is a bit fuzzy here. Here’s a retrospective on genres in film and television. (more…)


Top 10 Best of 2015

This week, we had to flip a coin as we were at a tie between the Top 10 Spherical Objects and this list. Either that, or we would have went for what I would have suggested: The Top 10 Best Spherical Objects of 2015… But that was a bit of a mouthful to say. This list won the toss and boom, we’re doing a list on our personal Best of 2015. Now, before we get into this one, let’s just explain what we mean by Best of 2015.

To be the best, it’s got to be appreciated above all the rest. These are things that Joel and I have both experienced in some way, shape or form and we’ve put their categories down so you can see for yourself what’s what. We do a lot of different things here on GeekOut, so this was quite a tough one for us both. Still, we think we’ve made a strong, comprehensive list and I hope you can agree with some of them for yourself. There’s some things which are very GeekOut orientated, but most of the things on here are general and can be appreciated by everyone. Let’s go for it, for the last Top 10 of 2015. (more…)