Advertisements

Geek Proud, GeekOut.

Posts tagged “Death

Top 10 Characters Who Are Too Powerful

GeekOut Top 10s

“Too powerful? There’s no such thing!” I hear you scream at us, as you take a swipe at the pages, turning it over and destroying worlds in the process. We are just suggesting that maybe, just maybe, sometimes a character is made that is far too powerful – A character that surpasses most other characters within their respective universes. In today’s Top 10, we’re celebrating those whose powers know no bounds – At least potentially.

(more…)

Advertisements

Top 10 – Rituals

It starts with an incantation, sometimes followed with some sophisticated dance. Often requiring some form of reagents, other times it requires sacrifice, we can only be on about one of the most complex types of magics. A mix between pure voodoo, religion and powerful forces unseen in the physical realm, today we’re delving deep in the world of rituals.

To lay some ground rules down for this, a ritual can be anything involving some complex mantra, activity or set-up. It can be easy enough to understand in principle, so long as there’s a reason behind the simplicity, these are rituals which have been prominently displayed in a series, a franchise, or even just as a one off in an episode. It also can feature in a video game, an RPG or otherwise.


Top 10

10) The Rite of Ash’Kente – Discworld

Click for original artist Puggdogg

Click for original artist Puggdogg

Not even the wizards of Unseen University know everything, but they do know a way to contact someone who does. It’s very inconvenient to drag Death from his eternal duties whenever you need an urgent question answered like “What’s that massive new star that keeps getting bigger?” or “What the hell just happened?” and He regularly appears in a bad mood, on one notable occasion still holding the pineapple-cheese stick from the party He’d just been abducted from.

Death is of course subject to wandering off and leaving His family to do THE DUTY, and they also take His place in the circle should the Rite be performed. There are many ways Ash’Kente can be conducted, many of which involve something dying and therefore summon Death by default. The most basic method requires three sticks and 4cc of mouse blood or an egg, but is often dressed up with dribbly candles and octagrams, for the look of the thing.

9) Eidolon Extraction & Cleyra’s Protective Dance – Final Fantasy IX

Cleyra_cathedral_concept

Final Fantasy IX, or FF9 as many people know of it, is one of those games that I talk about a lot. Sorry, not sorry. However in this particular instance, it’s worth noting that the game has many different rituals scattered throughout. These are just two of the main ones that affect the game in huge ways:

The Eidolon Extraction ritual is conducted by Zorn and Thorn, the two court jesters to Queen Brahne (and later working for Kuja). They do this to extract the power of the Eidolon’s so their masters can use the power of these beings to wage war across Gaia. They are successful at first, by taking away Princess Garnet’s Eidolons right at the start of the game. They try this at a later point in the game, too.

Cleyra is a settlement of the rat-people, the same species as one of the main protagonists, Freya Crescent. Cleyra is surrounded by an ancient sand storm which keeps their peaceful town safe from all outsiders. To keep the sand storm safe, occasionally they must perform a sacred dance, with music played from their harp. If the sand storm were to disappear, they would be open for attack and thus… war. See how these are all linked, now?

8) Anveena’s Sacrifice – World of Warcraft

486508-anveena-anveena-new-model

I’d not like to go into too much detail with this one, but this is a condensed version of what this is about. She’s a manifestation of pure energy and was captured and corrupted by Kil’Jaeden’s minions. With the energy of Sunwell Plateau captured and their intent of using all of her existing life force to summon Kil’Jaeden himself into Azeroth via a portal that she would be opening with her own power.

However, true to all heroic characters form, she snaps out of it and she was almost too late. She’s already opened the portal and the humongous demon Kil’Jaeden was already on his way through it. When she realises this, she uses the last of her strength and powers to make the ultimate sacrifice. She seals the portal around his torso, allowing the heroes of Azeroth to unite against this serious danger to their planet. So in short, Anveena both summons and weakens Kil’Jaeden, allowing Azeroth to hold off from disaster and even prevent it… Until Legion happened but we’ll have to wait and see what dangers from the Burning Legion this presents.

7) Summoning Exodia – YuGiOh

ANIME-Exodia-Cards

The theory – In order to summon the great Forbidden One you must gather his parts, head and body, and each chained limb. With his entire collection before you he is made whole and you automatically win the game.

The practice – Decks are basically built so that you can do a short series of delay tactics, all while ensuring that the parts come to you quickly and easily so that you slam the lot down on the table and claim a weak victory that no one enjoys.

So far as instant-wins in card games go it’s got a rather nice theory behind it, but sadly Exodia can be readily exploited. If you’re looking for a more interesting instant win then look up M:tG’s Hedron Alignment for something requiring a bit more effort. If you want an enjoyable experience with Exodia it’s readily found in the Abridged Series.

6) Rary’s Telepathic Bond – Dungeons & Dragons Wizard Ritual

Sage Advice Icon_0

Oh did we ever have some choices here. Amongst the catalogue of spells for all classes and all occasions in the D&D rulebooks, the magic mouths, the unseen servants and floating disks we eventually settled on one that any right minded wizard would have prepped and ready to go every damn day. You see only a right minded wizard should be allowed to do all of the planning and tactical decision making, these stick-waving imbeciles in metal underpants don’t have a clue!

What better way to make your thoughts known (and only amongst your allies) than to have them implanted directly into their minds? The Telepathic Bond allows for immediate mental communication between a full party anywhere in the world (other planes may incur roaming charges) to swiftly and accurately allow the wizard to share his/her ingenious insights into the situation, and to have those insights ignored more profoundly than ever before. A must have for anyone level 10 or above.

5) Summoning Shenron – DragonBall

ShenronDBZ

Ah yes, summoning Shenron himself can be considered to be a type of ritual. When you think about what a ritual is, it’s something that should be quite hard to obtain, perhaps because of time constraints, perhaps due to resource, or perhaps due to rarity of the objects being used. When you think of it like this, Shenron is in fact a ritual – but how does one simply summon a dragon that will grant you a wish?

You have to go across the Earth and collect all of the DragonBalls. I mean later on, they go off Earth and go to places like Namek and if you count DragonBall GT as canon, then across the freakin’ universe to summon a Dragon. Once you’ve collected all of the DragonBalls, you then have to say an incantation to summon the great and powerful dragon. Only then will you have satisfied the criteria to unleash this massive all-powerful being. I’d wish for unlimited wishes.

4) Human Sacrifice – Goat Simulator

goatsim-goatking

All shall kneel before Goat.

These days it’s fairly common knowledge that Coffee Stain Studios is built downhill from a ritual circle devoted to the great Hellgoat, whose powers are terrible, and whose physics are all kinds of broke. How else could such a success be made of a dumb little simulator game that doesn’t even work properly? But to activate the power yourself you must first have corpses, delicious corpses to feed the circle!

The most basic setting for Goat Simulator features some of the most interesting locales, like the gravity pit, the skate park, and the Tower, and within each are terrible secrets, but none require such devotion to activate as the circle. Oh sure, you could summon a bunch of lesser goats and do it, but where’s the fun when you could just snatch up the bodies of the screaming and insignificant peasantry to feed your unnatural hunger for power? Goats man, I’m telling you, they’re evil.

3) C’Thulhu Fhtagn – Lovecraft

maxresdefault

Between the dates of March 23  and April 2 every year, those who consider themselves particularly “psychically hypersensitive” and those of a particularly artistic disposition are visited by feverish dreams of sunken cities, ancient temples, and the slumbering gods who wait there. During the investigations of Inspector LeGrasse into related phenomena and the shocking similarities to the bas-reliefs and idols worshipped by disparate cults across the world he is shown a wide variety of nightmarish worship of elder and unworldly things.

Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn

It’s a phrase uttered on degenerate tongues, a fallen band of New Orleans voodoo priests, devil worshipping Esquimaux, in the hasty scribbles of mad artists and the most impassioned verses of drug-addled poets. Those who worship the idols and keep Its name alive are known to practice terrible rituals of blood, and they’re not alone. The people-smugglers of Red Hook demonstrate similar necromantic rites before a squat demonic entity in deep cellars, and in forgotten times the ancient de la Poer family ancestry sacrificed humans in terrible volumes.

2) The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion

The_Elder_Scrolls_IV_Oblivion_cover

This is a stretch, but bare with us on this one. Oblivion is a game about the whole game leading up to the climactic moment when the big baddy comes out and you fight it off. So far, so standard. But I want you to seriously think for a moment here and let us know what you think in the comments as well. The Elder Scrolls IV is about the summoning of the Daedric Prince of Destruction, Mehrunes Dagon.

Now that’s pretty cool and the game was universally praised (Even with the silliness of some of the glitches and voice issues that characters had)… However, if the whole game was about the summoning of Mehrunes Dagon, then how? Why? Do you remember those portals scattered across Cyrodil? Yes, you’re absolutely right… The whole game was actually a giant ritual to summon the Daedric Prince himself. You’re literally fighting against a massive demonic ritual… And when you stop to think about it, that’s kind of awesome!

1) Nationwide Transmutation Circle – Fullmetal Alchemist

NWTC

SPOILERS: Be warned, if you’ve not watched all of Fullmetal Alchemist and fully intend to, then this is a bit spoiler-y. You have been forewarned.

So it turns out the entire nation, the entire place the series is set in, all of it… Was a great big transmutation circle. A massively forbidden one which would see all that was within the circle destroyed. This was something that was put together by the government of the series, much to the chagrin of all of the protagonists. This was a group they had served (although somewhat unwillingly from Edward Elrics case) – and if this transmutation circle was triggered, it would see the destruction of all life within Amestris.

Why on Earth would anybody want to make this massive underground tunnel based transmutation circle, I hear you cry out? Why, of course, it was put together not because they wanted to eradicate life per se, but instead to create a massive, all powerful philosophers stone for the original Homunculus, Father. This was the ultimate plan for the Homunculi throughout… And when you think about a political power having someone that corrupt in charge, it’s enough to make you cringe.


Honourable Mentions

Rituals are one thing, but magic is a realm of almost unlimited possibilities. Although these next two didn’t quite make the cut for our Top 10 list, we felt they needed to at the very least be mentioned. After all, it’s not every day that you get to see powers like these…

Dice Superstitions

2014-04-25-20140425

We are creatures of habit and bizarre superstitions. For all that geeks tend towards logic and reason we also tend to observe patterns rather quickly, especially when it comes to dice. We all have that one dice that you can never ever use because it’s cursed, or a particular bag that’s lucky to keep dice in, one person at the table who can never roll a decent number until there’s some obscurely dramatic moment where they get that impossible critical.

Dice, cards, lucky controllers and mouse-mats, little habits and tics like not looking when you roll or stacking them up. We know it doesn’t make a difference, we know that they’re basically all the same, but… it is different, somehow, it’s yours and it’s special in its own way, and we hang on to them… almost ritualistically.

Rituals

Rituals

If I were to be very honest with you, the reason we picked this for our honourable mentions is because it’s literally called Rituals. We were running out of ideas at first, but when I saw this title, I decided to have a read through and you know what? It sounds pretty interesting. It’s something I’m going to pick up and do a full review on.

Rituals is a game about exploration and the eery connection between civilisation and nature. It looks like it’s quite a short game, but it’s certainly intriguing enough to make me want to get it, play it, record it and share it with you all… But what do you think? Let us know if you’ve played this in the comments below.


Incantations finished, our reagents are expended. That’s it, we’re done, we’ve used up our surplus of supplies and the demand for our next list is just coming through. Sheesh, but we’re spent for this week, so now it’s over to all of you. Help us decide what we do for next weeks’ Top 10 list. You can bet we can conjure up something great from any of the below choices.

Abra kadabra! Hey ho, it looks like we’ve gotten to the end of our ritualistic list of enchanting words and imagery. Nevermind, that’s just the end of the list, but it needn’t be the end of the discussions. How did we do on our list of rituals? Do you think we got the best ones, or did we miss that important ritual in your life? As always, please remember to leave us a message in the comments below, or over on Facebook, Twitter or Reddit.


Top 10 – Tearjerker Moments

Top10 Banner

We are caring people, and we have a nasty habit of getting over-invested in fictional characters, and their plight often becomes as dear to us as our own. When they suffer, do we not suffer? We explore the depths of our emotions with them as our guide, feeling their pain as keenly as we would our own, and when they die as all things must then we mourn them as profoundly as we would our flesh and blood.

In games, in anime, in film and television we find ourselves as easily brought to tears as we are by the struggles we encounter in our every day life, and those who have it far worse. So here we gather, once again, to elevate those moments to glory, our Top 10 tearjerking moments.

Have tissues to hand. (more…)


Everybody Dies

Characters in TV shows have a shelf life. Most main characters get to make it to the finale, but your average red-shirt or Cousin Joey might not make it to the end credits. By now we’ve grown so used to certain patterns in character death we’re starting to mock it.

Horror films – slashers especially – have become so predictable that even those few directors trying to hang a lampshade on the death-progression have started to be a cliché. Gone are the days of the black guy dying first, in fact he was the last man standing in Deep Blue Sea, a film famous for breaking kill-patterns by eating the biggest star early on… and actually that was Samuel L. Jackson so scrap the first point. Even the love interest ended up dead, which is becoming increasingly common these days, films like Drag me to Hell, and Cabin in the Woods often fatally separate partners.

Tucker-and-Dale-vs-Evil

Also, watch Tucker and Dale vs Evil, it’s just a great film

The death of a character can… and really should be a pivotal moment in a show, a chance for the whole cast to explore depths of emotion, and for the entire dynamic to shift. Take 8 Simple Rules as an example, a very solid family-sitcom with enough drama to keep it interesting that sadly lots the main actor and father John Ritter, and not through choice. The show persevered with a couple of new cast members and an adjustment period which must be praised for its’ sensitivity of a difficult subject considering the genre. Afterwards, while 8 Simple Rules managed to stay funny and of decent quality, it was definitely changed, and still raised moments of dealing with grief, made all the more genuine for the actual loss of the actor.

Perhaps the worst death pattern is the immortal protagonist, the character who just can’t seem to stay dead, no matter how often their killed, like a boomerang with a theme tune… or a DC character. Lazarus pits, ancient mystics or perhaps some other cunning means, like implanting the personality of a character into the body of a shapeshifting murderer until the murderous personality is suppressed, and just pretending like everything’s normal. Points to anyone who gets that one. The problem with immortal protagonists is that people start to actually want them dead for good, and it never seems to happen.

batman-vs-superman-will-give-fans-a-new-robin-a-new-lex-luthor-batman-the-fallen-rob-429424

Without question, the show that has managed/is managing to shock and harrow its audience with death the most must be Game of Thrones (accepting all arguments for other shows in the comments and Facebook). Main characters die more frequently than is entirely normal, and the deaths often come out of nowhere and are as dirty and ignoble as reality permits. Always worth making sure your character dies on screen though, if you didn’t see it then it’s only a maybe.

Death should be a big deal because death is a big deal! Game of Thrones was initially fantastic at presenting death in such a way that it was unpleasant, shocking, and pointless but now we sit on needles whenever we grow to like a character, becoming just as predictable as any slasher, but this time the man behind the mask is George R.R. Martin. Have we become numbed to death? Or are we still able to feel for the death of a character and not point and say “saw that one coming”?


Top 10 – Short Lived Characters

“A candle the burns twice as bright burns half as long… Mmm hmm”
– Scruffy, The Janitor

Top10 Banner

The most precious things in life are those that last the briefest, a snowflake, a rose blossom, the career of Fred Savage. They twinkle in the darkness before being swallowed by it, reminding us of our mortality and marking the passage of time. Is it their brevity that makes them so wondrous? Or does the memory of their shortcomings fade before that of their successes? Who can say for sure, but it is these brightest of flashes in an otherwise dull and listless life of successful stars and beloved characters that endure for years that we celebrate in the first Top 10 of the New Year! (more…)


The Hogfather

Only 174 more days to Christmas*! So this seems like the perfect time to continue our ongoing reviews of Terry Pratchett’s work with the Discworld’s most famous Winter Solstice tale, the Hogfather. (more…)


Reaper Man

What happens when the grim reaper itself becomes emotionally invested in its own job, with its own personality? Well, the Auditors of Reality decide they need to replace Death with a New Death, logically. Join me as we look through the wondrous story of Reaper Man.

Reaper-man-cover

Featuring some of the weirdest character developments in Sir Terry Pratchett’s whole Discworld universe, Reaper Man features Death who has begun to develop a personality which concerns the Auditors of Reality. They require their Death to be emotionless and focused on the job at hand and nothing else, so they send Death to the Disc in order to assume the life of a farmhand: Bill Door.

The reason I’m such a fan of this book is that it’s full of witty quips. Death still talks in its trademark all capital lettered style and we also learn some things about how Death works in the Discworld in most amusing of ways. Death has to learn a lot about the Disc in a short space of time, which along with its rather quirky personality makes life a bit tricky. Of course, couple this with the fact that people really aren’t passing on, due to the fact that there’s no death, some strange things happen. Supernatural goings on, in fact!

Credit: Deviant Art – violinsane

One of my favourite parts of this book is the easy back and forth banter between Death and Miss Flitworth, the lady whose farm Death works on. She’s an older lady, so she can’t see very well and when she first meets Death, who assumes the name Bill Door, they get into a dispute about what his name is. Here’s an excerpt from this amazing back and forth:

The stranger stared at her for a moment, and then looked around wildly.
‘Come on,’ said Miss Flitworth.’l ain’t employing no-one without no name.
Mr . . . ?’
The figure stared upwards.
MR SKY?
‘No-one’s called Mr Sky.’
MR . . . DOOR?
She nodded.
‘Could be. Could be Mr Door. There was a chap called Doors I knew once.
Yeah. Mr Door. And your first name? Don’t tell me you haven’t got one of those,
too. You’ve got to be a Bill or a Tom or a Bruce or one of those names.’
YES.
‘What?’
ONE OF THOSE.
‘Which one?’
ER. THE FIRST ONE?
‘You’re a Bill?’
YES?
Miss Flitworth rolled her eyes.
‘All right, Bill Sky . . .’ she said.
DOOR.
‘Yeah. Sorry. All right, Bill Door . . .’
CALL ME BILL.

This back and forth alone was enough to make a young me laugh along with Pratchett. It was probably the first time I had experienced an all powerful omnipresent being, such as Death, become such a blubbering, blathering buffoon. You can tell It is just saying what it has to in order to get by, and even though Miss Flitworth isn’t exactly fooled by the name, she just realises she’s getting an employee either way, so she’ll put up with the shenanigans. I disagree with her slightly, though – A Mr. Sky does indeed exist. Perhaps not on the Disc, though.

Credit: Planet Pulp

Reaper Man was such a well received book, it received a special adaptation called Welcome to the Discworld. I figure now is a good time to talk about the 90’s film, as it starred the recently deceased actor, Christopher Lee. He starred in many fantasy greats, such as the Lord of the Rings trilogy as Saruman and he was the original Dracula. So how did the Welcome to the Discworld short movie stand next to his others? Kind of bland, really… But nevertheless, it was just nice to see Discworld brought to life back then. It was a franchise that had been barely touched before, but heck, the Discworld MUD was going strong!

So this might not have been the “best” Discworld novel (from a general consensus point of view), but it might be my favourite. It’s a brilliant story, which you can’t help but laugh along with. You get the whole satirical view of Death and it has some of Death’s best banter to date… Not to say it doesn’t always have good banter. What do you think of Reaper Man? As always please leave your comments below, or over on Facebook and Twitter.


Top 10 Unique Mythological Monsters

Top10 Banner

What monsters emerge from the ancient nightmares of cultures long past? Well quite a few actually, but amidst the menagerie of assorted demons, half-humans, spectres, godspawn and all varieties of supernatural creatures are certain peerless legends, unequalled, unparalleled, un-third-thing that I didn’t think of.

Welcome back you lovely people, to our Top 10 Unique Mythological Monsters!


10) The Kraken

1317504038509

The mighty ship-sinker, the weapon of gods, the devourer of those who wander too long at sea! Of course we generally accept these days that the truth of the legend probably has more to do with colossal squid and the exaggerations of sailors, or it becomes a name attributed to any oceanic leviathan. Depictions vary, having any number of aquatic facets, like crab-claws, serpentine tails or a whale’s bulk.

The legends and writings surrounding the Norse monster generally depict it as unique, described by 18th century zoologist Carolus Linnaeus as a singulare monstrum. Now how often is it we get to go Latin in a top 10?

9) Typhon and Echidna

One is the most fearsome monster in the whole of Greek mythology, the other was his half-woman half-snake mate, Typhon and Echidna are two of the most well known monsters of their time. Starting with the man of this duo, Typhon was literally made as a destructive force to be reckoned with. Heck, this guy even ends up going toe to toe with Zeus and even manages to secure a victory over the god! Typhon is even mentioned in Dante Alighieri‘s Inferno, so clearly this destructive force is deserving of a nod, at the very least.

On the otherhand, Echidna was half of a beautiful maiden, though it was never explained which parts made her beautiful. People assume it’d be the upper half that made her beautiful and the lower half would be a terrifying, writhing snake. Well, I guess it takes all sorts to make the world go around. Echidna however played an important part in mythology: She was the mother of many of Greek mythologies famous monsters. Born in a cave, forever immortalised. But perhaps this duos biggest claim to fame comes now, as this oh so dreamy pair are on our Top 10 list. Yay..?!

8) C’Thulhu

Credit: TeePublic

Credit: TeePublic

Ah, everybody’s favourite alien-squid-cultist-priest-madness-driving-colossal-monstrosity.

Yes, C’Thulhu had to make our list of unique mythological creatures. He has quite the unique presence about him, able to drive even the sanest of mortals to a blubbering pile of flesh and bones. Insanity is what this creature delivers the best and he’s also been featured heavily outside of the C’Thulhu mythos of which he was derived. Indeed, he has even been seen on a few episodes of South Park.

But that’s not why he makes our list. He’s got a special place in all of our hearts as geeks and fans of horror. Plus, have you ever seen the T-Shirt of Cute’Thulhu? It’s so cute and cuddly that you can kind of forgive the massively monstrous abomination that hides behind that cute exterior. Aww… Tentacles!

7) Quetzalcoatl

865178387

How far could this list go without the mighty winged serpent of the ancient Aztec religion? Though he could adopt the form of a human, the great angelic snake that bridges earth and sky is the most legendary depiction.

Quetzalcoatl is often attributed with the creation of mankind by mixing his blood with the bones of a race that came before with the death of the fourth sun. In some stories, he kills himself by setting himself on fire, and that his burning heart becomes the fifth sun in the dawning of the current age.

6) Sleipnir

sleipnir

Odin rides into battle on his grandson. Well that about sums that up.

In a scheme to try and avoid paying a builder, Loki the trickster god turns himself into a mare, sleeps with the man’s horse, and later gives birth to an eight-legged foal, the greatest and fastest horse in existence. This particular story is unlikely to be featured in the upcoming film Thor: Ragnarok. I hope…

Odin once raced the Jotunn Hrungnir on his grandson. He’s also been to Hel and back. You know what? The Greek gods may be overtly messed up with a family tree that’s uprooting itself just to get away from them, but can we all agree that Odin riding his grandson around is a bit disquieting?

5) Slenderman

v3-38-Slenderman3

Creepypasta.

What a word, eh? Creepypasta. I mean is this like the Flying Spaghetti Monster if he were to turn into a Halloween icon? No, a Creepypasta is a story that was shared virally, usually via website such as Creepypasta. This was one of the earliest examples and do you want to know the funniest thing about it all? Since the Creepypasta was released, suddenly lots of people have reported having seen the real life Slenderman.

Say whatever you will of the cultural phenom of the modern era of horror, which may have been more recently overtaken by scarier Creepypastas, but this was the guy that truly started the scene off. Between him and Jeff the Killer, people were locking their doors tight out of paranoia. Ah thank you media, you take something, blow it out of context and help deliver mass hysteria. Also check out Marble Hornets!

4) Krampus

krampus

Returning triumphant from our Top 10 Alternative Santas to actually place on the list this time. The festive child-snatcher of Germanic folklore is a sad loss to common-place mythology, somehow a lump of coal just isn’t snapping kids into shape through December, but I bet if we started bringing back the chain rattling demon we could get them on their best behaviour from Hallowe’en all the way to February!

If you notice, I mentioned I was researching Krampus. One day I’ll tell you all about the ongoing saga that is my Christmas themed D&D universe and the role the Krampus plays therein, but it may have to wait until this years epic continuation.

3) The Loch Ness Monster

Hoaxed_photo_of_the_Loch_Ness_monster

It’s Nessie! The UK’s most famous monster of all, but if you want to disagree with me, go for it. I’d bet that more people, no matter what their walk of life is, know of the legend that is Nessie, or The Loch Ness Monster. But what exactly was this beast? Was it a friendly creature hanging around the Loch Ness? Or was it a terrifying monstrosity, waiting to consume all of humanity with its unbearably large jaws, worse than a snapping crocodile?

Well actually, it’s turned out so far to be a fruitless search for ol’ Nessie here. In fact, all sightings to date have been exposed as a fake. There have been reported incidents where someone said they found it and it turned out to be a log. Oh dear. Still, for those out there who believe Nessie is real, I hope that the legend lives on and stays in everyone’s hearts. I hope Nessie is never found. There’s something magical about the unknown… And that’s how Nessie should remain. Otherwise, we’ll have to update this article in the future and remove Nessie.

2) Anubis

220px-Anubis_standing

This God of Egyptian lore is one of the most famous, yet he didn’t feature too heavily in Egyptian Mythology. It doesn’t stop him being an impressive God of his people, overseeing a job that many would consider quite disgusting and also being the guardian as it were. Plus, he’s the only Egyptian god I know of that has a song dedicated to him (Metal).

But that’s not what has made Anubis such a prominent figure within Egyptian Mythology. He was the God of Mummification and the Afterlife. That’s no small feat, as the Egyptians were firm believers in the Afterlife. With the head of a Jackal, Anubis was more or less as the band Septic Flesh puts it: He was the guardian of the damned, appointed by the gods to be their final chance. With such an extravagant outfit and holding the Flail and the Fetish, this god was all about justice. He would weigh up the souls of the departed to see if they were fit for the afterlife. If you were bad, you’d better be ready to repent for your sins… Not like that’d help you by that point.

1) Medusa

258444_1273098839_orig

Youngest, and most famous sister of Stheno and Euryale, children of ocean gods Phorcys and Ceto, Medusa is alone amongst her siblings for being mortal. Does that make her any less awesome and terrifying? Not even a little. Even after Perseus decapitates her, he still uses her petrifying gaze as a weapon. Indeed the only thing seemingly able to kill Medusa, was herself! What weapon is effective against a woman who can kill with a glance?

Despite what many games would have you believe (Dungeons & Dragons being the most profoundly sinful) there are not multiple Medusae. No matter that the name lends itself to pluralization rather elegantly, she is one of many serpent haired Gorgons. She’s also a legend amongst legends, leaving behind her gods, titans, and elder things, statuesque as she claims our number one slot!


Honourable Mentions

Of course we’re not through. “Encore” we fantasize you shouting as we toil away at our keyboards to lavish our opinions upon you.

Legends, stories, myths and monsters are as old as humanity itself. Since we could make marks on a wall we’ve passed our knowledge and our thoughts from person to person, generation to generation. We could never narrow down our list to merely Ten, but only the deserving make the list. Here are few that we debated and decided against, but that we um’d and ah’d too long to simply pass them by without continuing their story.

Death

Oh, Death. You and your many disguises. Who or what are you now? Here’s a small gallery of Death, the Ultimate Cosplayer.

The World Turtle

f38ed1774b519dd6582a09c9b6a4a579

Great A’Tuin is based on some very real mythology. India, China and North America all have some variation on the visual spectacle that is the great turtle that swims the world on its’ endless journey through the cosmos. The phrase “turtles all the way down” is a sentiment used to disregard the mythology, as the idea that the turtle is supported by another turtle, which itself sits on the back of another turtle, which has another turtle between it and the one under… where was I going with this?


 

Now it’s your turn to get involved in commenting on this weeks Top 10 and for next weeks Top 10!

What other unique monsters have we missed? Who else is deserving of our esteemed list? As always, vote for next weeks Top 10 and let us know what you think we’ve done right and what you think we’ve done wrong. Is our order right? Let us know – tell us off! We’d love the discussion! Give us the business in the comments section, or on Facebook and Twitter.


Top 10 Death Noises in Games

For the most sobering quote you’ll ever hear: Death happens. I’m sorry to tell you, but whether you’re playing through Half-Life, or even a jolly old game such as Super Mario brothers, death happens. One thing about death is that it does take you by surprise. Your character may let out a little yelp from pain, or perhaps he or she’ll get some form of fanfare in his or her honour? Honestly though, we’re not going to lie… We were a bit weirded out that you, the GeekOut universe, wanted to pick… the agonising… Screaming… Death sounds of the world of games.  But, you chose it and we’re going to deliver it! This is our Top 10 Death Noises in Games!

(more…)


The Light Fantastic

Ah yes, it’s time for another look at one of the classic novels written by Terry Pratchett, the father of Discworld and all around awesome sci-fi/fantasy legend. In case you missed the last one, we had a look through the first in the Discworld series, The Colour of Magic, go check it out! We’ll wait right here whilst you go look… Are they gone? Good, let’s get on with this look at The Light Fantastic!

So this is the second book in the Discworld series and is a continuation from The Colour of Magic. As you may recall, that book finished on a cliffhanger. The Light Fantastic is the continuation and conclusion of this adventure featuring Rincewind the Wizzard and Twoflower the Tourist, along with their faithful companion, Luggage… the Luggage. Written in 1986, this was the only Discworld book to be a continuation of another Discworld book. No, seriously – I want you to go and find any other Discworld book that ends on a cliffhanger and is continued in another book. You won’t find one.

The Light Fantastic

The plot of The Light Fantastic is about the journey of Rincewind and Twoflower coming to an end, but along the way, there’s still some unresolved business. Rincewind manages to fall over the edge of the Discworld and is brought back by the Octavo, thus saving him. Without their knowledge, Death goes and tells the leading wizards of the impending fate of the world… Unless all of the spells are read from the Octavo. Typical, isn’t it that it’d have to be with the inept wizard Rincewind?

Of course, this means that Rincewind is now a wanted man… So a damn lot of wizards go out to capture Rincewind and the Octavo. After a while, Rincewind meets back up with lovable tourist Twoflower, before they are accompanied by the aging Cohen the Barbarian.

Rincewind

Through the rest of this story, we see luggage become a hero that saves Rincewind (Which is amusing to think a little box with legs could be a hero)! We also see more of the Great A’Tuin, who has decided to change the path the Discworld is on. We also see Twoflower go toe to toe with the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse… In a game of Contract Bridge. There are people who are heading to mountains after hearing about the impending apocalypse, because they want a better view.

The whole premise of The Light Fantastic is there to close off the events of The Colour of Magic and to bring resolution to this journey. It’s an amazing fantasy story filled with a lot of light hearted humour and wacky characters. Much like The Colour of Magic, there was a television show for this, which happened along side The Colour of Magic. Once more, David Jason retains his role as Rincewind.

You can buy fantastic Discworld miniatures from http://pjsmprints.com/miniatures/index.html!

You can buy fantastic Discworld miniatures from http://pjsmprints.com/miniatures/index.html!

Overall, The Light Fantastic is definitely worth the read. It’s got great pacing and it’s really satisfying seeing the end of the journey that Twoflower and Rincewind set out on. I won’t spoil the ending for you all, as I reckon you’d enjoy experiencing the story for yourselves. But that’s all for now, so what do you think? Have you read The Light Fantastic? What Discworld book should we have a look at next? As always, comments below, over on Facebook or Twitter. Keep the fantasy spirit strong!